Mardi Gordo, AnoMALIE style

So...
Mardi Gras...
Plus Cristiano Ronaldo's 23rd birthday.

How did I spend it?
-I tried every drug I could get a hold of...
-I got lit off my ass in honor of Mr. dos Santos Aveiro's 23rd... then drove...
-I fucked like a rabbit... the whole time imagining Mr. C. Ronaldo...
-I cussed AND blew cigarette smoke in the face of infants...
-I fought every girl who dogged me... even the ones who didn't, but I just thought were too damn pretty and thus intimidated me into punching them a couple of times...
-I talked shit about anyone and everyone...
-I stuffed my face until I vomited... a few times, very a la Roman orgy style...
-I shot a couple of people... mostly just old people who got in my way with their stupid walkers...
-I defaced public AND private property...
-And did I mention I robbed a couple of banks?

All in the name of Fat Tuesday!

In all reality, I just:
-Grew up a little by opening a checking account.
-"Mom"ed my little sister (just a little) for doing this.
-Proceeded to have a very "girly" evening with Mooney which consisted of watching 27 Dresses, an hour of Degrassi (Man, do I miss that show!) at her crib... where we chatted over--what else?!-- guys and how fucking annoying some Obnoxious motherfuckers can be (or how amazingly gorgeous others might be. Pardon my sighs, Mooney. I can be such a girl sometimes! :D haha).
-Ate (one of my friends has seriously messed me up when it comes to that word. I read it and think "Why the hell am I saying sister?!" I think I may be getting the swing of Tagalog) Tacos... some fucking amazing... delicious... wonderful... dreamy (not so creamy) tacos... Mmmmmmmmmm. I realize I do love me some tacos... real Mexican tacos... with lots and lots of cilantro. Viva Mexico! Ajua!
- Cussed... and cussed... and cussed... to my little heart's content. God... will I miss being vulgar... my heart aches.
- Borrowed American Psycho from Mooney... I'm so excited!
- Informed everyone I saw that "It's Cristiano Ronaldo's birthday today!"

All in the name of Mardi Gras.

**Warning, creepy-girl portion coming up ahead**

Happy Birthday to the love of my life... the most handsome man in the face of the planet... universe... solar system... whatever...
Mr. Cristiano Ronaldo.

Le sigh...
God bless the day you were put on this green Earth for me to gawk at... you fine, fine specimen... awesome in any and all angles. MMmmmm, mmm, mmmmm!

I really do hope Cristiano used some better looking prostitutes this time.

Ok... creepy-girl post ends here.
Haha.
What can I say? My teenage years were spent in the midst of the *NSYNC, BSB craze... it's not easy to let go of some of those tendencies now in my "adult" years.

Cristiano, your "too good"ness keeps me coming back.

Cristiano Ronaldo, you're the only love in my life! Aside from scoring the only goal in the Manchester win yesterday, that guy just knows how to make me smile when I'm having a rotten day (take from an article on ESPN):

He told Sky Sports 1: 'For me it is a penalty. Why when Cristiano is involved is it always polemic?"

Asked if he knew why controversial decisions seemed to follow him, he said: "I don't know why. Maybe some people don't like me. Maybe I'm too good.'"

Yes, you are, baby... yes you sure are...

***Edit: I have decided to remove the rest of this entry due to the fact that so many people goole "Cristiano Ronaldo" and I wouldn't want them reading my problems, because honestly, who does?***

P.S.: All you haters out there, give the boy some credit. I hate how some asses attack him because "he can't even speak English." Look, homies, there are plenty of people who are born in English speaking countries and still can't master the language. Make that accusation against those people, if you like, not against a Portuguese-born-and-raised boy that rocks at the sports and because of it, get exported to different countries.

Also, don't act surprised because he knows how to use "big words." He may look like a "himbo," but you should already know by his game that he's quite the smarty pants (and c'mon now, since when is "polemic" a big word? "It must come from the french 'polemique' and since Portuguese is so similar to French..." c'mon now! Spanish, French, and Portuguese have Latin roots.... and... I'll stop now... cause I'm not a linguist).

nana-nah-nah-nia-nia!