Friday, May 16, 2014

Focus, fool

So many events in the next few days have me frazzled as fuck.

There's a difference between me being frazzled, and me being angry/irate. Being frazzled is me being... umm.. spacey. When I'm frazzled, I can't concentrate on anything... I can't even form coherent sentences.
When I'm angry, I have an incredibly narrowed focus. I zero-in on something and proceed to gut the shit out of it. I get shit DONE... because it's what keeps me from going all aggro on the deserving twat who has managed to cross me (look! I'm suddenly British!).

Frazzled doesn't work. Frazzled is especially problematic when I actually have things to do.
For some inexplicable reason, very fucking randomly, a couple of people have requested paintings... from me. I didn't even offer or anything... it just randomly occurred... very fucking randomly.

I wouldn't mind pleasing these friends... as long as they don't make a big deal about the doodles... however, my brain isn't cooperating. My brain is gone. I can't even finish my painting from the other day. All inspiration is gone and I'm mostly functioning on automatic. I am a fucking robot.

But I guess anything beats the ugly feeling of wrath that overpowers me when people play me dirty or mistreat me.
It's nearly impossible to breathe when I'm seething... so... I'm not too upset about this lack of inspiration... this self-induced coma and whatnot. I guess.

(Oh, but I could bet my last dollar on fuming at some point this weekend... I BET my inspiration will return by Sunday night)

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