Monday, May 19, 2014

herds

Yesterday morning was spent consoling the birthday girl.
She reminds me so much of my sister, this birthday girl.

I remember that birthday I had to drive over to the Palazzo to a crying, very drunk Sister.
"No one came..." and she burst into uncontrollable sobs.
She hadn't invited me to this birthday party at the club... and while I was still hurt over the slight, I was more upset over my sister being so heartbroken.

Today's birthday girl was upset over everyone (something like 20 "confirmed" attendees... which, I admit, is fucked up. If you're not sure about going, DON'T RSVP... it's fucking simple) flaking on her. I believe only five of us showed up to her festivities... and Kelley and I tried our best to hang for as long as possible... but once the weed came out, we were done.

These girls, no matter how old they get, refuse to understand that many people, TOO MANY people, are shitty people.
These girls seem to wrestle (and lose) with the fear of doing things in small groups, or worse-- on their own.

Just like many don't understand my loner tendencies ("Oh my god... you go to the gym alone? I feel sad thinking of you just sitting there alone!" ... yes, because I go to the gym to SIT by myself and just gaze at the meatheads for hours at a time-- that's sarcasm, by the way), I don't understand those who must be in a goddamn herd in order to be happy.

If you rely on others in order to be happy, you are going to be sorely disappointed on a continual basis.
Happiness comes from within.
And yeah, I'll try to remind myself of those two lines whenever I get sad... I really should follow my own advice.

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