Remember the time my godfather tried hooking me up with his cousin... who turned out to be gay?
The boy was lanky, shy, sweet, and very artistic.
He was trying so very hard to please his family, but it took me less than five minutes of knowing him to realize he did not like girls. This of course, only endeared me to him. Though we lived in different states, we became friends-- always encouraging each other during our rough times.
His family is highly religious... hardcore catholics, and it was visible on his face how much his "secret" was killing him.
When he came out, his family was mostly in denial. The younger cousins thought it was "just a phase" and that he'd "snap out of it" soon enough. His aunts and uncles would either ignore the topic of HIM all together... and there were also those who'd mock him and condemn him. His mom was torn... and resorted to some heavy drinking. His dad preferred to ignore it all and hide in his own world.
Those who stood by his side, initially, were few.
Back in 2010, when I dropped by Chicago for a quinceañera, I had the opportunity to hang out with him for a week.
A huge party had a bunch of family living together for a week. Stressful, but fun.
I remember that on my last day in the city, he came up to me as I quietly stood in the kitchen corner at my godmom's house, munching on an apple.
Him: So what's up with this ice queen act of yours?
Me: Huh?
Him: I know this whole thing... (points his index finger at me, waves it up and down) this thing where you hang out by yourself and hardly speak to anyone, is just an act. You're no ice queen... you're a sweet heart. Come here. Give me a hug.
I remember standing slack jawed, bitten apple in hand like... the evil witch in Snow White. I looked at him as though he were crazy.
He walked over to me, and proceeded to give me the warmest hug I had felt in years. His arms were wrapped around mine, so I stood there in a... warm cocoon of confusion, pretty much immobilized.
I felt my eyes ready to betray me, ready to shed those tears, but instead I giggled and thanked him.
"Ice Queen" has since become a running gag between us.
He's ambitious. He parties hard, but works harder.
Proof was given on Sunday:
The boy was lanky, shy, sweet, and very artistic.
He was trying so very hard to please his family, but it took me less than five minutes of knowing him to realize he did not like girls. This of course, only endeared me to him. Though we lived in different states, we became friends-- always encouraging each other during our rough times.
His family is highly religious... hardcore catholics, and it was visible on his face how much his "secret" was killing him.
When he came out, his family was mostly in denial. The younger cousins thought it was "just a phase" and that he'd "snap out of it" soon enough. His aunts and uncles would either ignore the topic of HIM all together... and there were also those who'd mock him and condemn him. His mom was torn... and resorted to some heavy drinking. His dad preferred to ignore it all and hide in his own world.
Those who stood by his side, initially, were few.
Back in 2010, when I dropped by Chicago for a quinceañera, I had the opportunity to hang out with him for a week.
A huge party had a bunch of family living together for a week. Stressful, but fun.
I remember that on my last day in the city, he came up to me as I quietly stood in the kitchen corner at my godmom's house, munching on an apple.
Him: So what's up with this ice queen act of yours?
Me: Huh?
Him: I know this whole thing... (points his index finger at me, waves it up and down) this thing where you hang out by yourself and hardly speak to anyone, is just an act. You're no ice queen... you're a sweet heart. Come here. Give me a hug.
I remember standing slack jawed, bitten apple in hand like... the evil witch in Snow White. I looked at him as though he were crazy.
He walked over to me, and proceeded to give me the warmest hug I had felt in years. His arms were wrapped around mine, so I stood there in a... warm cocoon of confusion, pretty much immobilized.
I felt my eyes ready to betray me, ready to shed those tears, but instead I giggled and thanked him.
"Ice Queen" has since become a running gag between us.
He's ambitious. He parties hard, but works harder.
Proof was given on Sunday:
 |
| That's my boy, right behind you know who at the you know whats. |
EVERYONE was proud.
No more shame. No more ridicule. No more lamentations. Just... chest-puffing pride.
I remembered the Quinceañera week.
One of my little cousins... I think he was 17 at the time, was somewhat freaked out because he had never been around an openly gay man. It was a trip to watch the boy change his very closed mind the more he interacted with my friend. My little cousin went from saying shit like "For a gay dude, he's pretty cool. It's hard to believe he's gay," to "He is such a cool dude!" by the end of the week.
One of my little cousins... I think he was 17 at the time, was somewhat freaked out because he had never been around an openly gay man. It was a trip to watch the boy change his very closed mind the more he interacted with my friend. My little cousin went from saying shit like "For a gay dude, he's pretty cool. It's hard to believe he's gay," to "He is such a cool dude!" by the end of the week.
It made me happy to see someone realize that gay people, are in fact, people... and often, people can be pretty fucking extraordinary.
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