Thick

Aaaaand then my mom calls me fat.
Shit just keeps getting better.

I was standing at the kitchen sink, washing my dishes, when my mom walked up from behind and started her little verbal assault.

Mom (laughing): You... have a boxer's body now...
Me: What do you mean? Like a butch one?
Mom: Your back is... very wide. You're... thick.
Me: ...
Mom: Have you weighed yourself recently?
Me: ... no...
Mom: You definitely have to be much heavier than the last time you weighed yourself.
Me: ...You're calling me fat?
Mom: You're definitely much thicker.
Me: So, fat.
Mom: THICKER. You're thickening out.

My mother has always had a way with words.