When I grow up, I wanna be just like my mom!

I've always had a hard time finding a good gift for Mom.

I look around for days... but after around the fifth day, I tend to do the hippie thing and just handcraft her something (it's worked for 21 years. Birthdays, Mother's Days... you name it).

Look Ma! I made this with my bare hands! It's a cup! Happy birthday!
Yeah, it made me feel a little guilty... and sometimes wonder why she never said something like:
"Enough, Frida Kahlo! I want a real gift!"

But finally! After so many years, the idea for the perfect gift has dawned on me:
Some people may see this as lame; yesterday, I would have agreed. Who the hell wants a briefcase for a present?

Well, recently, my folks have ran into a lot of paper work. Visiting their CPA more often than usual.
They carry along this really important contract that I've never seen so much drama over. Then today, for the first time, I saw what my mother carries these "very important" papers in:

Have you ever seen Donald Trump walking around with that shit? No. Not one of those wannabe apprentices, either.

I laughed for a while... especially once Mom started laughing.

Me: What the hell is this?
I was going to throw the bag and its contents in the trash, but Mom stood in my way as she drank some water from the faucet (I've never been too fond of that habit). Mom looked over as I held the bag. She was going to say something, but instead, she spewed the water that was in her mouth and laughed out loud.
Me: What?
Mom: No! (laugh) That's my (laughed hard enough for me not to make out a word)...
Me: Your what?
Mom: That's my "Business Woman Bag!"
Me: You mean... you go visit David (CPA) with this thing?
Mom laughed harder.
Me: He hands you the papers... and you stuff them in this bag? And you hand him things... from this bag?
Mom was laughing too hard to talk, she just nodded.
Me: Couldn't you at least make it an Albertson's bag?

Oh, my dear mother... you win the prize when it comes to penny pinching!