Greetings from Hell

Dear, dear, Sweet Jesus...
I understand people have to pay for the bad they've done on this Earth... but... am I really that horrible? What is up with all this bullshit I've been dealt? Ok... maybe I should have chosen a much gentler word than "bullshit"... but I get angry... and then turn vulgar... you know me.
Please... please make these days go by like the blink of an eye... I'm going insane... and you know something's terribly wrong when I study molecular biology and I don't fall asleep after two paragraphs...
Love,
A very frustrated, tired, bummed-the-fuck-out AnoMALIE.

I'm damn near close to hitchhiking my way back to the States.
Mexico's a damn sausage fest... and while I know "normal" girls would enjoy the extra attention, I keep as much distance from the beasts (it's like vultures when they see a fresh carcass... it's BAD).
I hang out with a crew of 5 teenaged boys (aged 17-19, I do have some standards...) because there are probably 7 girls in total in this town... and those girls are enjoying the male attention to the fullest... so I don't really get along with those chicks.
But here comes the bulk of my stress:
On my way to Mexico... once we were already in Chihuahua... Mom dropped a bomb on me.
We're going to keep your grandma at our house.

WHAT THE FUCK? No...no... NO! Let me the fuck out of this truck! Noooooooooo!!

Yeah, I know that makes me look like a bitch, and frankly, I don't give a flying fuck.
Maybe if we were people who enjoy spending our vacation locked in our house watching television all day I'd be cool with that... or maybe if my grandma liked me...
but no!
The othe day my grandma was poking me for a good 3 minutes as I only stared and smiled at her like "WTF are you doing?"
She's my 87-year-old grandma... I have to take the poking and smile like a dipshit the whole time!
Then comes the issue with our dog: the hundred-pound pitbull who loves running into the house, but despises any other human... and my grandma: the little old lady who likes opening doors because she tends to forget where they lead.
You have no clue how many mornings I get up freaked the fuck out thinkig my grandma is trying to open the door (she tried the other day and I swear I felt my heart stop).
So here, poor Tyson (the dog) suffers as well because we have the door leading to the backyard locked with three huge ass locks.

I'm just upset and irritated... I can't stand having to stay home to take care of somebody.
I should have jumped out of the damn truck when I had the chance...

Help me, God.