Sunday, September 9, 2007

The AnoMALIE Show

Me: Happy Birthday, Lady (I say this as a term of endearment, really)!! Now... what would you like for your birthday present?
Mom: What I ask for every year...
Me: ???
Mom: I just want you to keep being a good girl... please.
Me (internally): Shit... wouldn't you prefer... a big screen T.V.? Jewelry? A nice dinner?
Me: Laaaaaaame!

(So then I took her to P.F. Changs...)

Mom turned 48 today.
For some reason last week, I kept thinking she was going to turn 43.
Yeah... like I'm dying to repeat being 18 all over again... pffffffft!

It used to be easier to please Mom and her dumb request... it was like getting off scot-free. But as time goes by... it grows increasingly difficult to uphold her wishes.
It's like asking Mexico to win the next World Cup. Yeah, they try to win it.... but will they ever? No (as long as the poor guys keep averaging a 5 foot 6 in stature... I'm afraid they'll keep losing to the European goliaths). You just set more realistic hopes... like "Please... just please... make it to the top 16... and then you can lose and I'll just start rooting for Portugal... or Italy... or Brazil..."

Same goes for me.
Yeah, I try to be a good girl... but come on now! I live in Vegas! And taking that into consideration... someone better start building a statue of me or something... 'cause I'm pretty damn saintly when compared to many local chicks.

This doesn't mean I want to go all crazy or anything... but it'd help knowing I wouldn't be letting down my mom if I were to stay up just a little bit later than usual... or I wouldn't be giving my mom a heart attack when announcing my upcoming trip to the bay area... or any area for that matter.

it seems to me the only trip I'll be taking this year will be a fucking guilt trip.
Shiyetttttttt.

In other news (man, I'm realizing this weekend was busy for me. That's a first... I shouldn't say that, especially since next week catechism classes resume. That just makes me want to shoot myself sometimes... but it's like a drug... I can't quit it no matter how determined I am when I enter the office to offer my resignation and thank them for the Umteen years they've been so good to me), yesterday I was really amused by a cousin-who's-like-a-sister's reaction to something I said.

She's been gone for a while, but she's back now... and since she has her own place, I visit and feel like an adult etc, etc (haha... me an adult... good one).
So we were catching up (because blogs don't even get half of the information going on in either one of our lives) and we got to the subject we've talked about since... well, practically since we had use of our brains: guys. She told me what went on while she was in Orlando (entertaining as hell), and so I thought it'd only be fair to tell her what went on in Vegas while she was gone (as boring as it was going to be).

Me: Hmmm... things were slow... but, while you were gone I found myself getting a crush on this one dude...
Mooney: Ok
Me: Yeah... but... not someone you'd expect...
Mooney: ...Ok...
(I'm sure she was expecting to hear me say something like "He was once a she," "He's a serial killer," or "He's my cousin")
Me: Yeah... he's 32...
Mooney: That's HOT!!!
Me:... and divorced...
Mooney: That is SO
hot!!

It made me feel like I was on some reality T.V. show (amusing, in a good way, I swear Mooney)... very à la episode of the Hills.
AnoMALIE: Pueblerina in Vegas City Girl's clothing.

I really should walk around with a camera crew behind me.

1 comment:

Mooney said...

Well it is hot. :D You know how I have things for older guys, i.e. Mariachi teacher...hell this older guy/teacher thing has been going on since like 5th grade. But Mariachi dude is 28 and divorced. He's hot. You've seen his picture. LOL.

I'm watching the VMA's doing my laundry. I missed Britney in the beginning...woo! Justin called out MTV and told them to play some actual music videos. It was EPIC.