Thursday, January 26, 2012

Convenience vs. Vanity

It's once again that dreaded time in a person's life:
It's time to renew my driver's license.

On Monday I received a letter from the DMV, where it was reminding me of my license's quickly approaching expiration date.
I have the option to renew on-line.
Fucking heaven-sent, right?
Not so much.

First off, I fucking hate my current license due to my hideous photo. It's terrible!
Dope cropping job I did on this back in '08, huh?
It also becomes a fucking hassle when I have to bust it out at clubs or bars. Bouncers/waiters give me a bitch of a time when carding me (like seriously, homie, I'm NOT underaged here. Give me my motherfucking drink and leave me the fuck alone!). It fucking sucks.
Second, I have a smaller head now... OF FUCKING COURSE I want to show that shit off. Sure, I'm older now... but my head is smaller now. Do you know how fucking important that is? Shit... it's pivotal in a chick's life, ok? Smaller head (greater than) Older.
And last, and the main reason, is because I get to drop the weight on that motherfucker... you know, NOT lie on that section.

I want to go to the DMV and get the photo retaken and all that shit... I just don't want to deal with the line... or the people (there's always one asshole who totes around his devil-spawn who won't shut the fuck up and continuously screams in my ear. Every fucking time). I also hate the new licenses. They're beyond cheap and weak as fuck.

So... I can either
1. Go the vain route and get a new photo and weight information... but deal with the unpredictable DMV line and carry the cheap, new licenses.
or
2. Keep my sturdy license, avoid the lines and renew on-line... but keep the disgusting current photo with the huge weight still displayed on that bad boy (weight on which I LIED and made myself 30 pounds ligther... yeah).

Oh... decisions, decisions.
(Fuck it, I'm going personally and getting that new shit.... I'm just going to wait for the massive pimple on my chin to disappear... and for my next eyebrow threading appointment. Hey, I am a girl, afterall)

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