Tuesday, August 14, 2012

We used to be cool, Summer!

Yeah... August is definitely not my month. Actually... this entire summer has not been my SEASON.
What... I had like... a combined total of perhaps 14 hours of happiness? Smiles I paid for dearly within HOURS, when I walked to my backyard to find my dead dog.

Spent so many years daydreaming about some day hanging out with this one guy... and somehow, as if by some sort of magic trick, I spend a weekend in his presence... three days where this cheesy smile didn't leave my face. Fast-forward eight hours after throwing up the deuces to the guy... and I find Tyson.
It's really, REALLY hard to convince me something out there just DOES NOT want me to be happy.
I hadn't been that type of happy... in ages, and then the Universe delivers this terrible blow... just violently rips out my heart. It gave me a couple of hours in the company of a dude I've crushed on for eight years (Oh, the fucking awesomeness this has added to my short story... nice comic relief, at my expense of course, which is always the kind I go for), and then it takes away the ONLY creature that stuck by me--thick and thin, 24/7-- for 11 years of my life.
Seriously... what kind of fucking joke is that?
The rug was really pulled out from right under me since then... and I've been slipping so fucking hard ever since.

Things have only gotten worse.
Currently, I'm in one of the worst fights I've had with my sister. Of course I think I'm right... I KNOW I'm right. So my arm isn't twisting on this one.
She has resorted to giving me the silent treatment... which... we all know how that works out with me.
Homie, YOU'RE the one living alone 1800 miles away, not I. Tell me how well that works out for ya, buddy.

And last, I am no longer enjoying alone time. My folks are once again home... arguing... pissing me off... all that good shit.
Mom HAS made me laugh a few times... so... that's cool.

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