So I've been in a shit-tastic mood lately.
Twiggy suggested I'm like this because I miss my parents. I told her she couldn't be more incorrect. What she was saying was comparable to saying Russians miss Stalin... sure, there are a few out there who do miss the man, but for the most part, people are better off. Same here (sorry Mom and Dad... I still love you, though).
No, my sadness was brought about by the accumulation of the tiny things. Then the wack memories associated with many "small things."
Anyway, as promised, I tried cheering up.
Difficult task at first, considering I woke up to the sound of a stranger's voice.
(I swear, I better go to a cardiologist before my insurance expires next month)
GODDAMN! I KNEW SOMEONE WAS GONNA BREAK INTO THE HOUSE!
Instead of going all ninja on the supposed intruder, I sat as still and quietly as possible in my bed (my entire body under the covers, of course).
As I slowed my breathing and cleared my head, I sat there trying to make out what he was saying.
How the fuck did this nigga get in my house without me noticing?
He was in my sister's room.
D!! (Fuck calling her "sister" all the time, it confuses me)
Then the front door opened, and I heard Sister's car drive off.
That sneaky little bitch.
I got up and sat in D's room. It reeked of drunk dude.
When D came home, about five minutes later, she was startled to see me.
D: How long have you been awake?
Me: A while.
D: Um... so... I got three texts at 3:30 in the morning. It was Lito. "I need your help." "Help me." "Please help me!" When I texted back, he told me he was too drunk to drive. He was at the Crazy Horse, and since it's only like, two minutes away from us, he knew I'd be the one closest to help him.
Me: Had someone mugged him or what?
D: No, he was just too drunk. Since he lives so far away (NE part of town, we're SW), he just wanted to know if he could just sleep it off at our house.
Me: Ok.
D: When I brought him home, I told him he was sleeping in Rafa's room... but when he walked in there, he turned into a baby and complained it was too cold and passed out in my room. So then I had to sleep in the cold room.
Lito would have stayed longer, but one of our cousins called and said she was dropping by, so D shooed Lito away. While normally I'm kind of uptight, and I'm sure this would make Mom have a stroke from being so furious, I see how she was just being a good friend. I would have done it too... so I agreed to help her out in the cleaning.
In the middle of cleaning, we saw he had bloodied D's pillow.
::puke::
Drunk men... such a pain in the ass.
Anyway, I then decided to dress in bright colors, and I manicured my nails... with the one thing that makes girls smile: sparkles.
I now have the equivalent of Michael Jackson's silver glove slathered on my nails.
GLITTER!
And that did it.
:)
I'll always be that five year old kid at heart.
I'll hold off on making myself some macaroni jewelry... for now.
Twiggy suggested I'm like this because I miss my parents. I told her she couldn't be more incorrect. What she was saying was comparable to saying Russians miss Stalin... sure, there are a few out there who do miss the man, but for the most part, people are better off. Same here (sorry Mom and Dad... I still love you, though).
No, my sadness was brought about by the accumulation of the tiny things. Then the wack memories associated with many "small things."
Anyway, as promised, I tried cheering up.
Difficult task at first, considering I woke up to the sound of a stranger's voice.
(I swear, I better go to a cardiologist before my insurance expires next month)
GODDAMN! I KNEW SOMEONE WAS GONNA BREAK INTO THE HOUSE!
Instead of going all ninja on the supposed intruder, I sat as still and quietly as possible in my bed (my entire body under the covers, of course).
As I slowed my breathing and cleared my head, I sat there trying to make out what he was saying.
How the fuck did this nigga get in my house without me noticing?
He was in my sister's room.
D!! (Fuck calling her "sister" all the time, it confuses me)
Then the front door opened, and I heard Sister's car drive off.
That sneaky little bitch.
I got up and sat in D's room. It reeked of drunk dude.
When D came home, about five minutes later, she was startled to see me.
D: How long have you been awake?
Me: A while.
D: Um... so... I got three texts at 3:30 in the morning. It was Lito. "I need your help." "Help me." "Please help me!" When I texted back, he told me he was too drunk to drive. He was at the Crazy Horse, and since it's only like, two minutes away from us, he knew I'd be the one closest to help him.
Me: Had someone mugged him or what?
D: No, he was just too drunk. Since he lives so far away (NE part of town, we're SW), he just wanted to know if he could just sleep it off at our house.
Me: Ok.
D: When I brought him home, I told him he was sleeping in Rafa's room... but when he walked in there, he turned into a baby and complained it was too cold and passed out in my room. So then I had to sleep in the cold room.
Lito would have stayed longer, but one of our cousins called and said she was dropping by, so D shooed Lito away. While normally I'm kind of uptight, and I'm sure this would make Mom have a stroke from being so furious, I see how she was just being a good friend. I would have done it too... so I agreed to help her out in the cleaning.
In the middle of cleaning, we saw he had bloodied D's pillow.
::puke::
Drunk men... such a pain in the ass.
Anyway, I then decided to dress in bright colors, and I manicured my nails... with the one thing that makes girls smile: sparkles.
I now have the equivalent of Michael Jackson's silver glove slathered on my nails.
GLITTER!
And that did it.
:)
I'll always be that five year old kid at heart.
I'll hold off on making myself some macaroni jewelry... for now.
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