So... it appears that little motherfucker I killed the other day (the spider) ended up being the goddamned Spider Emperor or some shit...
I made some spider community VERY angry by killing their damn leader.
My foot injury turned out to be not one... not two... or three... but FIVE spider bites to my fucking left foot.
FIVE. On one foot. The bastards bit THROUGH my sock... and raped the fuck out of my foot.
My right foot was bitten twice.
Needless to say, yesterday I was MISERABLE AS FUCK!
I was so miserable and paranoid, I asked my sister if I could sleep in her room... since the spiders probably wouldn't be able to find me there.
I went to bed around four in the morning, 'cause I swear I felt spiders crawling all over me.
It was terrible sleep... but in the morning, I was relieved to see my foot was less swollen (oh God, I seriously pondered taking a photo of my foot... but I was TOO grossed out by it... I still get goosebumps when I think about it). My sister was pretty upset, though... she woke up with a spider bite on the inside of her right elbow.
What the hell is wrong with you? What the fuck do you wear to attract spiders, you freak?! Look what they did to me!
Ooooopsies. She was wearing a hoodie, mind you, when she got bitten.
Still, after all this, I said "Fuck you, foot! I'm still working out, you piece of shit! Fuck the pain!" and I went off to lift to my little heart's content.
Mistake.
Well, I was good, up until the clean and pressing. With six more to go, I started getting tunnel vision, and the music started to sound further away (and I was lifting weak-sauce weight, so this freaked me out).
I tried shaking it off, but half way through some tricep push-ups, I went all... weak... and I couldn't move an inch further because I could feel the puke fighting (and beating) my cardiac sphincter. I felt light headed, and took a ten minute break (a fucking eternity!). I finally called it quits when it came to the lunges. They felt HORRIBLE! Others asked me if I was ok, because I looked like a ghost.
I'm ok... it's just the Proactiv... it's fucking with my pigmentation and turning me into a white girl.
Before getting in my car, I did what is second nature to me, and I barfed next to my car's back tire.
A sweet little forget-me-not for the driver who was going to take my spot.
After vomiting, I felt refreshed... sure, my breath smelled like shit, but I was back to hearing and feeling.
I felt so fantastic, I went off and played photographer with my buddy's band (after showering and brushing my teeth, of course).
My day grew instantly better when I was given this little guy:
He doesn't have a name yet. So far, all I know is that I want to make some sort of name amalgamation between Albert Camus and... some other philosopher... not sure who the other person will be. So right now, he's just Albert.
Anyway, hanging out with the BFF and her band made me feel better, and completely forget about my stupid foot.
My favorites?
And many more, but I don't want to be over here like one of those annoying mothers who constantly show photos of their kids to anyone who will look.
I was too busy snapping photos of the guys to remember about my swollen foot.
Notice what's missing from my day?
I kiiiind of forgot to eat.
Is that what spider venom does to a person? Suppress hunger? Some suckers might want to try this out.
Oh, and now, before going to bed, I checked out my foot, and bam! ALL BETTER. Yeah, the middle toe is still slightly swollen, but my entire foot is back to its normal color.
Take that, spiders! Your fucking venom ain't shit! Look at me, only growing more immune to your shit! FUCK YOU!
All right... ok... I'm better now. I had to get that out of my system. I officially LOATHE (not to be confused with FEAR. I don't fear those fuckers. I just hate them and I will NEVER do anything to attempt to save/conserve them. Burn in hell, spiders... except tarantulas... I like those. They're precious) spiders with ALL of my SOUL.
Ok, I need to go to bed... I'm fucked up.
I made some spider community VERY angry by killing their damn leader.
My foot injury turned out to be not one... not two... or three... but FIVE spider bites to my fucking left foot.
FIVE. On one foot. The bastards bit THROUGH my sock... and raped the fuck out of my foot.
My right foot was bitten twice.
Needless to say, yesterday I was MISERABLE AS FUCK!
I was so miserable and paranoid, I asked my sister if I could sleep in her room... since the spiders probably wouldn't be able to find me there.
I went to bed around four in the morning, 'cause I swear I felt spiders crawling all over me.
It was terrible sleep... but in the morning, I was relieved to see my foot was less swollen (oh God, I seriously pondered taking a photo of my foot... but I was TOO grossed out by it... I still get goosebumps when I think about it). My sister was pretty upset, though... she woke up with a spider bite on the inside of her right elbow.
What the hell is wrong with you? What the fuck do you wear to attract spiders, you freak?! Look what they did to me!
Ooooopsies. She was wearing a hoodie, mind you, when she got bitten.
Still, after all this, I said "Fuck you, foot! I'm still working out, you piece of shit! Fuck the pain!" and I went off to lift to my little heart's content.
Mistake.
Well, I was good, up until the clean and pressing. With six more to go, I started getting tunnel vision, and the music started to sound further away (and I was lifting weak-sauce weight, so this freaked me out).
I tried shaking it off, but half way through some tricep push-ups, I went all... weak... and I couldn't move an inch further because I could feel the puke fighting (and beating) my cardiac sphincter. I felt light headed, and took a ten minute break (a fucking eternity!). I finally called it quits when it came to the lunges. They felt HORRIBLE! Others asked me if I was ok, because I looked like a ghost.
I'm ok... it's just the Proactiv... it's fucking with my pigmentation and turning me into a white girl.
Before getting in my car, I did what is second nature to me, and I barfed next to my car's back tire.
A sweet little forget-me-not for the driver who was going to take my spot.
After vomiting, I felt refreshed... sure, my breath smelled like shit, but I was back to hearing and feeling.
I felt so fantastic, I went off and played photographer with my buddy's band (after showering and brushing my teeth, of course).
My day grew instantly better when I was given this little guy:
 |
| He looks so friendly! AND smart! |
Anyway, hanging out with the BFF and her band made me feel better, and completely forget about my stupid foot.
My favorites?
 |
| It has an eerie feel... and I LOVE it! |
 |
| It was between this one and the one with the gnome :) |
 |
| I like the feel of this one, too |
 |
| Aaaaaasterionella! |
I was too busy snapping photos of the guys to remember about my swollen foot.
Notice what's missing from my day?
I kiiiind of forgot to eat.
Is that what spider venom does to a person? Suppress hunger? Some suckers might want to try this out.
Oh, and now, before going to bed, I checked out my foot, and bam! ALL BETTER. Yeah, the middle toe is still slightly swollen, but my entire foot is back to its normal color.
Take that, spiders! Your fucking venom ain't shit! Look at me, only growing more immune to your shit! FUCK YOU!
All right... ok... I'm better now. I had to get that out of my system. I officially LOATHE (not to be confused with FEAR. I don't fear those fuckers. I just hate them and I will NEVER do anything to attempt to save/conserve them. Burn in hell, spiders... except tarantulas... I like those. They're precious) spiders with ALL of my SOUL.
Ok, I need to go to bed... I'm fucked up.
5 comments:
The drummer is a hottie.
I knew it! :) the moment I saw him I was like "yep... Mooney would like him..." He's a really cool dude
Ahahaha! He's getting married in July.
I know i've said it in every electronic channel.. but thank you so much again!!!
they worked for you then? Yay!
Haha, you know me so well!
Kelley! I need to listen to your band! :)
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