I've had a journal since second grade, when my teacher in Mexico (it was that year where my folks thought they were going to move and raise us there. That would have sucked dick) made me start jotting down what I did each day.
Back then, all my entires would end in "Fin." I don't know how the fuck I got credit for that (though I never did the epic assholery my brother did in his school journal. His second grade teacher would collect the journals at the end of the week, so when she finally got to read Rafa's, there were about three days in that one week where he filled up two pages worth of "Hoy no hice nada" translates to "Today I did nothing." Now THAT is awesome at another level).
(viernes 25 De septiembre De 1992. Almorse un licuado y me fui a la escuela y estudie y sali de la escuela y me fui enque mi madrina Rosa-alisia y me fui a la casa y fuy a ser la tarea y me fui a dormir. fin--- sadly, I MAY write longer run-on sentences NOW)
Back then, all my entires would end in "Fin." I don't know how the fuck I got credit for that (though I never did the epic assholery my brother did in his school journal. His second grade teacher would collect the journals at the end of the week, so when she finally got to read Rafa's, there were about three days in that one week where he filled up two pages worth of "Hoy no hice nada" translates to "Today I did nothing." Now THAT is awesome at another level).
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| I wish I were this concise today. I AM happy my handwriting improved... a little. |
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| Commemorating Rafa's birthday in writing since 1992 |
(domingo 27 De septiembre De 1992. Almorse serial y me cambie y me fui a la Iglesia y sali y me fui a el casador porque mi ermano cumplia años 9 años y me fui a *hometown* y llege a la casa y ise la tarea y me fui a dormir fin-- I still don't know why this lady didn't get on my case over the run-ons)
(almorse un licuado y fui a la escuela estudie y sali de la es-cuela y me fui a la casa y luego fui a *Hometown's municipality* y me compraron un helado helado y fui con mi tia Licha y ise la tarea y me fui a dormir. fin-- What can I say? I loved me some licuados [milkshakes] and tia Licha time)
Not much has changed... except I'm far more neurotic now... and I'm not that much of a milkshake aficionado today.
Anyway, I've been keeping some form of journal since then.
I entered the on-line thing because of a high school classmate. She was the... I don't remember if it was the student body president, or just the junior class president, but point of the story was: she was some sort of president.
She was nice... I guess... just very... how should I say... misguided? She was very pretentious. She was very opinionated... but her opinions weren't always very... well thought out. She could be HELL of ignorant... but I think it was only because she was just... brought up that way? She never really meant it to be an asshole, she just didn't know better, I guess.
Anyway, there would be days when I'd get along with her, then there were others where her big mouth would nearly give me a myocardial infarction.
Her: SO... now with this whole... 9-11 thing... like... how is it to wake up a Muslim today... you know a week later?
AfghanFriendofMine: ... the same as any other day... ?
Her: Like... you don't... feel fear of showing up to school? Maybe... think about putting on a little make up so you DON'T look too... Afghan?
AFoM: No. I didn't do it. No family member of mine did it. Why should I be scared?
Yo, Alexis, YOU'RE not scared of walking around the halls being... well... you know... white... and you know... your ancestors once owning slaves and everything... and now with slavery being abolished and everything... you're not scared of walking around town? Maybe try putting on a little blackface... or at least getting a tan... so you know... you don't look too white?
I'd hear shit like that almost on a daily basis, because we had almost every class together since we were part of the tight-knit AP group.
Her comments would make my skin crawl... and quite honestly, I'd often fight the urge to slam my thickest textbook across her face.
Then, one day, as if by magic, I found her on-line journal.
I didn't say shit... I just read. And read. And read.
I got to know her beyond "the annoying girl who asks ignorant questions and thinks she's always right. The girl who will also go to extremes to make others 'admire' her."
In order to keep track, and read her shit, I had to make my own account on the site...
AND SO, my on-line journals came to be (well, the first one. Besides that one and this one, I don't have any more... and I don't plan to, either).
Anyway. I thought of all this because this girl finally became engaged today.
This girl, who most of us had great difficulty dealing with cordially, found a dude who wants to spend the rest of his life with her.
Good luck to you... both of you.
Hopefully she grows as a person and becomes less eager to garner laudations from others (that's me, taking on her voice. She's the one who taught me the term "verbose," and I only memorized it because my brain linked "Alexis = Verbose." I KILLED that word on the SAT)... and hopefully he... has a strong heart and easily-vaso-dialating blood vessels... 'cause someone's gonna be cursing the gods on a regular basis.
And I? Well, Ray Charles has got me covered.
No one bothers to get to know me.
(See what I did there? Well, only if you know my name, that's when it makes sense, I guess)
Even Annoying Alexis could find someone who didn't let her go... should give me hope, but somehow it only makes me sadder. Hmm.
The song IS gorgeous, though. And absolutely 100 percent pertinent to my life... since like... 4th grade.
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| Like how Mom tried to disguise her writing in my little journal? Props to her. What 7 year old can write that fucking word? |
Not much has changed... except I'm far more neurotic now... and I'm not that much of a milkshake aficionado today.
Anyway, I've been keeping some form of journal since then.
I entered the on-line thing because of a high school classmate. She was the... I don't remember if it was the student body president, or just the junior class president, but point of the story was: she was some sort of president.
She was nice... I guess... just very... how should I say... misguided? She was very pretentious. She was very opinionated... but her opinions weren't always very... well thought out. She could be HELL of ignorant... but I think it was only because she was just... brought up that way? She never really meant it to be an asshole, she just didn't know better, I guess.
Anyway, there would be days when I'd get along with her, then there were others where her big mouth would nearly give me a myocardial infarction.
Her: SO... now with this whole... 9-11 thing... like... how is it to wake up a Muslim today... you know a week later?
AfghanFriendofMine: ... the same as any other day... ?
Her: Like... you don't... feel fear of showing up to school? Maybe... think about putting on a little make up so you DON'T look too... Afghan?
AFoM: No. I didn't do it. No family member of mine did it. Why should I be scared?
Yo, Alexis, YOU'RE not scared of walking around the halls being... well... you know... white... and you know... your ancestors once owning slaves and everything... and now with slavery being abolished and everything... you're not scared of walking around town? Maybe try putting on a little blackface... or at least getting a tan... so you know... you don't look too white?
I'd hear shit like that almost on a daily basis, because we had almost every class together since we were part of the tight-knit AP group.
Her comments would make my skin crawl... and quite honestly, I'd often fight the urge to slam my thickest textbook across her face.
Then, one day, as if by magic, I found her on-line journal.
I didn't say shit... I just read. And read. And read.
I got to know her beyond "the annoying girl who asks ignorant questions and thinks she's always right. The girl who will also go to extremes to make others 'admire' her."
In order to keep track, and read her shit, I had to make my own account on the site...
AND SO, my on-line journals came to be (well, the first one. Besides that one and this one, I don't have any more... and I don't plan to, either).
Anyway. I thought of all this because this girl finally became engaged today.
This girl, who most of us had great difficulty dealing with cordially, found a dude who wants to spend the rest of his life with her.
Good luck to you... both of you.
Hopefully she grows as a person and becomes less eager to garner laudations from others (that's me, taking on her voice. She's the one who taught me the term "verbose," and I only memorized it because my brain linked "Alexis = Verbose." I KILLED that word on the SAT)... and hopefully he... has a strong heart and easily-vaso-dialating blood vessels... 'cause someone's gonna be cursing the gods on a regular basis.
And I? Well, Ray Charles has got me covered.
No one bothers to get to know me.
(See what I did there? Well, only if you know my name, that's when it makes sense, I guess)
Even Annoying Alexis could find someone who didn't let her go... should give me hope, but somehow it only makes me sadder. Hmm.
The song IS gorgeous, though. And absolutely 100 percent pertinent to my life... since like... 4th grade.
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