Cinco de Mayo!
Ajuaaaaaaaa! ::shoots up in the air while holding down imaginary mustache (ahaha...imaginary...that's good, J/K!)::
Viva la raza, homes!
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.
Cinco de Mayo is SO a gringo celebration. An excuse to get drunk with a Mexican while singing something like "Ay, ay, ay, ayyyyy! Cantaaa y no lloressssss!" And then taking body-shots off some "Mexican."
Ask "normal Mexicans" (i.e. Mexican-Americans) when Mexico's independence is, and I can assure you more than two thirds will get it wrong. I can almost bet on it.
Anyway!!
Mami's back!!!
(Yes, I'm 22.)
I was attempting to go to bed at 2:30 AM, but the rumbling of a loud ass diesel truck "woke" me up (i.e. interrupted my slow Chayanne jam, "La Playa").
I looked out my window (I hate it... because it juts out of the house... and while I was scared of a drive-by getting me back in the old neighborhood, I now fear some douchebag speed racer busting through my wall and killing me in my sleep) and saw it was my tiny little mom getting out of my dad's huge truck.
I ran outside in my pajamas (mistake, cause it was freaking freezing) and greeted her.
I helped her un-load a ton of things she brought for us (candy, "Takis" chips... the BEST chips on this planet! Some Mexican Fresca-- the BEST and ONLY soda I'll drink. She even brought some contraband black berries from my grandpa's tree).
It was crazy to see how happy she was.
Then we got to the story telling... and she made me cry.
If I think about it, I'll still get bummed out.
She also told me my aunt took pictures of my grandpa... and I'm definitely not going to be looking at those.
She told me all these weird things my grandpa did pre and post death. It's kind of creepy.
Ex: She said that the night before he died, he fixed everything in his room... and laid out a new pair of dress pants and dress shirt.
He always had a thing for telling us
"When I die, you better dress me up nice. New clothes, new shoes, nicely combed, neatly shaven. I don't want to get buried looking like some homeless beggar."
That night before he died, he also shaved...
Weird stuff.
So, as Mom unpacked, I cried a little... we laughed a little... and then we got a tad bit angry thinking about the drama my aunt brought to the whole thing because she was trying to get as much stuff as she could. We stayed up talking till 4 in the morning, then I finally went to bed at 4:30.
All in all... I'm glad she's back.
HOWEVER, not all can be fine and dandy.
Last night I got this text message from my little sister:
Hey, Jessica's staying over, so I'm gonna go pick her up, take her to *Twiggy's* house, then we're coming home. Clean up my room and do my bed.
Ok, anything else, Master?
See, my little sister loses control. I can see when you invite people over to your own house... but when you live with your folks, you can't just make arrangements like that without letting the people in charge know. She sees Mom isn't home, and she goes all wild child on me and does as she damn well pleases.
So here I am, 11 PM cleaning her stupid, dirty ass room... I finish that and then check out her bathroom.
Fucking atrocious. That's all I can say.
So then I start cleaning her bathroom (well, this girl's gonna have to use it at some point, right? Imagine the horror when she walks in there and sees five different types of bacterial colonies living in the sink!)... and then I move on to cleaning the mirrors... and then I start sweeping the floor.
I felt like maybe I should have just changed my name to Maria and done my hair up in two braids.
Si, Señora. Have any children you want me to raise?
Little sister strolled in the house at 2 in the morning with her loud buddy Jessica.
Loud Buddy Jessica's our cousin, but still... I don't really get along because our personalities clash and she's only 16.
I almost had a heart attack because for the last 3 hours I had been trying to play a convincing role for Dad, to make him believe Little Sister was already in the house, and here you have these girls practically ringing bells as they walked in the house.
When Mom came, it was a total shock for both girls... and they tried to act as if they were already asleep.
But Mom was pissed.
Mom became hurt when Little Sister didn't go outside to greet her. She wouldn't have been so upset had she not heard Little Sister and Loud Buddy Jessica giggling and gossiping in Little Sister's room.
"Mira que cabrona..."
Then today, as I was having a dream of a giant nephron being stuck in my eye (yeah... it was a STUPID dream), I was woken up by Little Sister and Loud Buddy Jessica talking about, what else, boys.
If they talked like normal people, I wouldn't have heard them... but here they were squealing and "Oh! I know!!"ing loud enough for the neighbors to hear.
Sure, I got to listen to some good gossip about Little Sister... but it was gossip I could have lived without ever knowing (seriously).
She also committed the huge mistake of waking me up (and I had only had 4 of my mandatory 7 hours of sleep!).
No house was on fire... no person was dead... just... some stupid ass boy had pissed Little Sister off and she was boasting about the way she broke up with him with Loud Buddy Jessica cheering and admiring Little Sister (sometimes, I feel like I'm living a movie).
I'm not a happy AnoMALIE right now... but my Mom's home!
And SPIDERMAN 3 tonight!!
Freaking mornings, I hate you.
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