I am notorious for my amazing ability of making TERRIBLE decisions.
I never fail to make idiotic decisions, which leave everyone--myself included-- confused... wondering what the FUCK made me think that shit was such a great idea.
Walk in front of that cow and pet the calf?! Does this idiot WANT to get killed?
Today was my latest showcase of less than spectacular judgement.
I was having a lovely morning, I had a tasty breakfast, I did my "This tastes like glory!" jig in my seat at the kitchen table, and I prepared to go to the gym.
I had everything completed, with a few minutes to spare, so I did what any other person with free-time does: I got on-line.
I did the usual e-mailing thing, and went off to the wonderful world of Facebook.
Ah, Facebook! My best frenemy!
As I browsed through the morning's events, I noticed one of my hilarious cousins had commented a video... a suspect video, where I couldn't make out what the hell was going on.
I saw every comment was along the lines of "WTF did I just watch?!" and "Why the fuck did you post this?!"
And what do I do? I watch the motherfucking video, of course!
What did I see? Two shirtless dudes, sitting down, slightly beaten, and with their hands tied behind their backs.
One was a fat bald dude in his mid-to-late twenties, who looked hell of pissed off. The second man was a thin, hick-ish man... in his mid-forties, and he was chatty. He was speaking Spanish, and saying that "Ya me llevo la verga" which pretty much means "I'm fucked." He was relaying a message, telling "others like" him that they better leave or end up like him-- fucked. Then he nods at the camera and leans against the wall. The fat dude just looks at him, clearly disgusted
Cue the chainsaw.
Yes, chainsaw.
I want to puke just thinking about it...
Anyway, so the masked assassin approaches the skinny man and BAM! Chainsaw to the neck.
It was a light touch, but... obviously cut the guy's aorta. The look on his face will haunt me for LIFE.
Then the assassin goes on for another nick at the neck. No luck with finishing the job, so he just goes at it, full-force, like carving a turkey.
The whole time the fat dude is turning his face the other way, but eventually looks over at the scene once he realizes the chainsaw has cut his left arm, since it was where the skinny man was leaning on him.
I had to stop the video when I saw a second guy going right for the fat dude's neck. I couldn't watch that one. I was too traumatized. I had enough.
WHY do I keep doing this? Because I'm a fucking idiot!
Now excuse me, I have to go watch video of puppies and kittens and pandas for the next three hours to recover positive mental images...
I never fail to make idiotic decisions, which leave everyone--myself included-- confused... wondering what the FUCK made me think that shit was such a great idea.
Walk in front of that cow and pet the calf?! Does this idiot WANT to get killed?
Today was my latest showcase of less than spectacular judgement.
I was having a lovely morning, I had a tasty breakfast, I did my "This tastes like glory!" jig in my seat at the kitchen table, and I prepared to go to the gym.
I had everything completed, with a few minutes to spare, so I did what any other person with free-time does: I got on-line.
I did the usual e-mailing thing, and went off to the wonderful world of Facebook.
Ah, Facebook! My best frenemy!
As I browsed through the morning's events, I noticed one of my hilarious cousins had commented a video... a suspect video, where I couldn't make out what the hell was going on.
I saw every comment was along the lines of "WTF did I just watch?!" and "Why the fuck did you post this?!"
And what do I do? I watch the motherfucking video, of course!
What did I see? Two shirtless dudes, sitting down, slightly beaten, and with their hands tied behind their backs.
One was a fat bald dude in his mid-to-late twenties, who looked hell of pissed off. The second man was a thin, hick-ish man... in his mid-forties, and he was chatty. He was speaking Spanish, and saying that "Ya me llevo la verga" which pretty much means "I'm fucked." He was relaying a message, telling "others like" him that they better leave or end up like him-- fucked. Then he nods at the camera and leans against the wall. The fat dude just looks at him, clearly disgusted
Cue the chainsaw.
Yes, chainsaw.
I want to puke just thinking about it...
Anyway, so the masked assassin approaches the skinny man and BAM! Chainsaw to the neck.
It was a light touch, but... obviously cut the guy's aorta. The look on his face will haunt me for LIFE.
Then the assassin goes on for another nick at the neck. No luck with finishing the job, so he just goes at it, full-force, like carving a turkey.
The whole time the fat dude is turning his face the other way, but eventually looks over at the scene once he realizes the chainsaw has cut his left arm, since it was where the skinny man was leaning on him.
I had to stop the video when I saw a second guy going right for the fat dude's neck. I couldn't watch that one. I was too traumatized. I had enough.
WHY do I keep doing this? Because I'm a fucking idiot!
Now excuse me, I have to go watch video of puppies and kittens and pandas for the next three hours to recover positive mental images...
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