Mi Boca

Of all the powers in the world, I was given one of the lamest.

What is my power?

I make people lust after whatever I put in my mouth.

Haha.

No, seriously.
Instead of serving as a cautionary tale to people ("Do you wanna end up looking like this?! Well, then don't eat the garbage she's eating!!"), I tend to make people crave whatever it is that I'm eating.
Not only does the CPK story serve as a good example, but today, I was given more proof of this ability of mine.

I went to work with Mom because Bambi had to go get an oil check/15k mile service/poly-whatever-it-is-that-makes-her-pretty-and-shiny.
Well, as we waited for the dealership to finish up with Bambi, I sat at work watching a couple of lame-o Mexican soap operas with Mom (we call this "working").
I first opened a small bag of regular chips... and grabbed one of the many ketchup packets we keep near the coffee jar (bus drivers are strange... they know how to use the left-over fast-food ketchup packets on God knows what). While I'm not much of a ketchup fan, I really do like eating regular chips with a streak of ketchup on top (it's soooo good!).
Anyway, this one bus driver walked in, grabbed a water bottle, and as he was paying, looked over at me. Right when he was going to leave, he reached over for some chips and paid for them... then he grabbed a ketchup packet (HA-HA! I told you! He'll be eternally grateful to me after he has that first chip).

Ok... maybe it's just... luck... or maybe he was really, really hungry.

Then came this one lady who was buying cigarettes.
By this time, I was eating a "Bit-O-Honey" while complaining of Marlene Favela's inability to act ("Duuuude! Why must the ONE chick from the same place in Mexico as us be such a crappy actress! Look at that! What a monotone! She only gets jobs because of her boobs! Nobody cares what you sound like anymore!").
The lady asked for a packet of... I think she wanted Kools. She looked around (because what was going on the screen was a graphic make-out session between Monotone Favela and some old man who thinks he's still sexy) then went straight for a pack of Bit-O-Honey.

Victima numero dos!

I had been sitting around work since 2 in the afternoon... by 4 PM I was irritable (you try hanging out at a gas station--for buses, so I guess it's a diesel station-- for more than thirty minutes!).
I asked mom for a packet of M&M's and made myself comfortable with the two seats Mom has located in front of the television (a bar stool and a small "futuristic" chair that makes you relax real nice when you lean back). A little like this:
While I sometimes felt embarrassed when the younger bus drivers walked in to see me splayed out like that... sometimes with my arms over my head like some stripper... I didn't move from my position.
Well, the one bus driver I'm a little fond of--he makes me laugh, ok?-- walked in.
He joked a little about me sitting the way that I was, talked about his day at court, then he grabbed a soda.
"Ok... ok! You convinced me... I'll have some of those," he said.
Wha... ??
"You know, you have a real sales person sitting right there," he told Mom as he pointed at me.
Mom got him a pack of M&M's and I gave him a thumbs up.

What ever will I do with this newly-discovered power of mine?

P.S. Fuck, I have some fucking retarded relatives! TravelinDin... ummm... Dad is adamant about seeing your Spain pictures. Why? Because idiot Sin Tia told him to "Just go to Mai-Espeis and you'll see her pictures."
Umm... it's advisable to change the captions to some of those pictures... i.e. "I think we were drunk." You know... just a suggestion... since he's all... hardcore fundamentalist Christian right now.
X(
Also... that one picture of your nose ring...
For some reason... I think la pendeja de Sin Tia told Dad you were either 1) partying too hard or 2) got a nose ring...
Either way... I'm trying my hardest to give him excuses of why I can't see your pictures...
So... umm... change your shit 'cause I can only hold him off for so long... and he's starting to grow increasingly disgruntled.
Uh-oh...