From Russia, without love

Last night JC called me.
It was 10:30 PM, I had spent the evening hanging out with Mom's siblings, and we had just talked about JC's family at the gathering. Some shady shit happened to his family in Mexico yesterday, so I thought that's what the call was about. I answered immediately.

Me: What up?
JC: Heyyyy! Guess where I am.
Me: I don't know... last time we played this game your motherfucking ass went to Argentina on a whim. Jerk.
JC: I'm in LA... actually, Rancho Cucamonga, to be precise.
Me: Oh, that's only a couple of hours away. Cool. Why?
JC: My friend Lisa came to visit me. You know Lisa. Say "Hi," Lisa.
Lisa: Hi?
Me: (internally) Who the fuck is Lisa? (spoken) Ummm... hi?
JC: You remember Lisa.
Me: Who?
JC: My Russian friend. From Russia. I stayed with her when I went in March.
Me: OOOOO!
JC: So I'm showing her around... and I was wondering... if it's not too much to ask... if... you guys are free on Wednesday?
Me: Umm... I'm pretty sure I am. Why?
JC: Well... I want to show her around Vegas... and... I'm a guy... so I thought maybe you girls would know where to take her better than I do.
Me: Oh! Ok. For sure.
JC: ... and... well... we didn't plan this, so we haven't booked a hotel...
Me: (internally) Aww, fuck! Here we go... (spoken) Well... if you wanna stay with me... you can. Just that Rafa's in town, so we have one less bedroom available.
JC: Thank you! That's what I was looking for!

So... looks like I'm going to be cleaning the house today.
Fucking awesome.
What is it with these boys and their lack of... good judgement?
The main reason why I didn't turn him down was because I know that poor Lisa girl's story.
She's the one who first met him (and fell in love with him) in France the summer of '09, spent two weeks showing JC around Moscow this March, and towards the end of his stay, she straight up asked him (teary-eyed) "JC, why can't you love me?"
I felt my heart get crushed for her when JC told me the story.
How's that for some twisted-ass bullshit? She likes him, but he doesn't like her, he likes me, but I don't like him... and I like... NO ONE in that triangle. Fuck that.

So... fellow Lonely-Hearts Club member, I'll totally clean my house for you and show you the city.
JC's sleeping on the couch in the cold-ass family room.