Sunday, May 15, 2011

rocks

I need a rock. A giant... humongous rock... to hide under.

Always happens. Always fucking happens.

The part that always sucks, and I doubt it'll ever change, is trying to act cool... as if I don't feel shit.
I either do a great fucking job, or people are just... the most horrible creatures to walk the earth.

How many times, and in how many different ways, can a person's heart break?
A question I was never eager to answer, but apparently, someone somewhere chose me at a very early age to be part of the lab mice for this one.
I think, right now, the answer is 17 and six.

I'll never get it-- why it happens and why I put myself in the position to be hurt.
What's that saying... the one Einstein supposedly said, about the definition of insanity being the repetition of an action, with the expectation of getting a different result. Something like that.
Hmm.

No, I'm not intoxicated right now, though I really wish I were. It'd make it so much easier to fall asleep and forget everything.

2 comments:

Kelley said...

:( I'm sorry.

AnoMALIE said...

aww, nothing to be sorry about. It's just other people really need to learn to grow up, and be a little nicer to others, or at least not try so hard to be so mean. I'll never understand what drives others to be that way. It boggles my mind.